Six years distilled down to one simple practice.

Did I say simple? I meant hard.

🦋 SIX YEARS 🦋

I used to credit my sobriety to miracles. And perhaps that I woke up at 2am on this day six years ago, after saying "Never Again" one more time and that I fumbled towards an idea that just maybe I could do something different was indeed a miracle. Every other minute of the last six years has required a whole lot of work.

What has been the hardest lesson to learn in Human School? For me, learning to be uncomfortable. That's it. Sitting with discomfort while not desperately grasping to change the channel. You may hear the word "discomfort" tossed around a lot, so to be more specific, it means being sad, unfulfilled, angry, melancholy, anxious, excited, even joyful. After some practice, you find out that letting it be won't kill you, so you just keep practicing. I'll let you know when I'm at Mastery Level but I have a feeling that is a long ways off.

From an outside pair of eyes, my life probably doesn't look remarkably different. But the rhythm of my days has entirely changed. Today, I rose before the Sun with a prayer of gratitude (not a plea) after a hard and dreamy eight hours of sleep. I read for an hour, my absolute favorite thing to do in the early hour, meditated for 20 minutes and took off for a run in my neighborhood. I'll tend to my kids, our home, I'll spend at least five hours in my sewing studio, creating tangible beauty that is the truest expression of my soul's DNA. Later, I'll eat some good food, mostly plants. I won't get to swim in the springs today and that will make me uncomfortable, but only for about 10 minutes. I'll probably watch some dystopian fiction (that's looking more like reality 😯) on Hulu but I'll go to bed knowing if I lay down with a clear mind, I'll be more than okay.

No magic potion and a bibbity bobbity boo new existence but one minute thoughtfully stitched to the next has made for an exceedingly beautiful life on some days... and a pretty good life on the rest. 🦋

I'm not an official recovery coach but I can teach you how to sit with discomfort. I can show you how my creative practices added so much depth and meaning to my recovery, and not just as a place to focus my attention while I sat in discomfort (although it's been certainly useful in that way), but also show you how it can be an experience so valuable and precious that you'll not want to forfeit another second of your life over to a substance that is not serving it. If you have a hunch that this could be the thing that could keep you sober like it did me, I'm here to help you. Sign up for Change Your Story, and I'll help you walk towards an entirely new way of living. It's not magic panacea but there's an alchemy that happens in the practicing, in the making, in the walking. My life today is living proof.